I Just Sighed

James+Bosh to Miami rumor gave me a sigh of relief this morning.

I understand that if LeBron/Bosh/Wade team up in Miami, it might be one of the most riveting teams to watch that I’ll ever lay my eyes on.  For the first few games.  But I can’t help but believe that fatigue will set in for NBA fans, and soon after they hoist their championship trophy in front of adoring crowds, within days they will become the evil empire. The tides will turn quickly after people have seen that the experiment worked, and there will be a sense that we’ve seen all we needed to see. They'll turn into the obstacle instead of the saviors.

And it wouldn't be a standard 21st-century restless “On to the next one” type of response, the reason being that this wouldn't be a team birthed from some imperfect world.  This would be a team that would have already answered all of the foregone conclusions of what the end of the story will read.  There will be nothing exciting about seeing them win a championship again (and again), because there will be no legitimate antagonist in the story if they play their cards as painstakingly measured as they always have.  I don’t see how rooting for them after 1 year will give any sort of joy. Only some sort of obligated cheer for a team that is now a hazy embodiment of a misappropriated dream.  

In fact, the only rooting interest will be for anyone that has a punchers chance at dethroning them.  That will be where the drama and excitement will lie, and the LeBron/Wade/Bosh trio will become a villainized caricature of its former self, with every NBA fan projecting their harshest critiques upon them. 

And will the Miami fans still have anything to root for?  I mean, I know their team will be winning, but is this the way you really wanted to win?  (If the Shaq championship left you feeling empty, then you will sink to even lower depths)  And do you really want your team to be viewed as gluttony incarnate?  I can’t see that being a highly sought after state of fandom when rooting for your local squad.  Lets hope 3 of our greatest superstars aren’t swallowed by an unintended narrative.

What will remedy an impeding lack of future?

Why do I have the sneaking suspicion that my team is about to get hijacked?

News today about LeBron reportedly having made up his mind about coming to the Bulls and bringing Bosh with him made me want to throw up. Literally. (figuratively)

Real talk. Chris Bosh coming to the Bulls is a must, and obviously our site takes that seriously, hence the name... But the stakes are too high to let him ride in on LeBrons coat tails with his eyes drawn to the ground every couple seconds. And what sort of dynasty is being promised as a result of this magical elixir?

By the way, living with dynamic tension in life isn't a bad thing. That tension is a natural force of life, it doesn't go away when a lesson hasn't been learned. Anyone looking for LeBron to swoop in and begin his natural destiny of multiple Championships is standing in the middle of the Red Sea looking at the shoreline in the distance with a false notion that they will soon be able to lay their bags down. Failure will not elude the Bulls if the King makes Chicago his choice destination. And when faced with that reality, it will be harder to stomach when it happens, knowing we gave up an authentically flawed team that was on the brink of unlocking eternal life. Purgatory in Egypt seems to be the rhetoric of most Bulls free agent commentary these days though. Lets not run away into the arms of half satisfied future.

A Plea From A Raptors Fan (Yes, We Exist)

OK I admit it, I’m not the greatest fan of the NBA or WNBA for those sensitive types out there but here’s what I know: if Chris Bosh, or as we in the Great White North spell it, Boush, were to leave the Big Smoke for greener pastures to the Bulls or Lakers, Raptors fans shouldn’t be surprised but they should be bummed. If Bosh departs, we’re looking at the new Clippers and who wants that on their conscience?

If Raps GM and well dressed-man Bryan Colangelo loses Bosh for nothing to a higher bidder and sends “Turkish sensation” Hedo Turkoglu packing (The brackets around Turkish sensation was as close as I wanted to come to slander. Not sure how the internet deals with that sort of thing so I played it cool and kept it tame.) Then surely he’ll have as much explaining to do as the BP Marketing Department.

The Raptors can’t afford to lose CB4…for his nickname alone. The guy is as entertaining off the court (see: You Tube videos, potential baby abandonment in Texas) as he is on the court with his flair that’s best described as a combination of the flair of an Apocalyptic rant from Pat Robertson and the grace of a swooping eagle with dreadlocks. The Raptors would be crazy not to give this guy max money and he would probably sign no question if he had someone like Kobe or in your Chicago Bulls case, Derrick Rose playing alongside him. But they don’t. Here’s who Bosh may be leaving behind:

Andrea Bargniani, a decent but so far not explosive player who needs Bosh to stay just as bad or else he’s the man. Turkoglu, he’s as good as gone and really would anybody say they noticed? Colangelo could try and get a pick back for him but with his huge contract, any deal he’s taking some money back for sure. DeRozan proved he could play in the NBA last year and I think he is someone to build upon, along with the pick in this year’s draft, but he won’t convince Bosh to stick around. And the rest of the cast isn’t much better.

So here’s the rub for Bosh…he can’t leave. Hey he can but let’s look at how two former Raptor employees who “needed to leave Toronto” fared. Vince Carter left. Look what happened. No more slam dunk awards, no more Gatorade ads (or sweet Milk ads here in Canada), no more love for Vince. And if you really want to look at past Raptors ghosts let’s look at the storied career of Isaiah Thomas. Boy I bet he wishes he never left T.O. (or falsely accused his daughter of overdosing…just thought I’d throw that out there.) All I’m saying is I don’t want to see the Raptors become the new Clippers. Can’t that be enough? So if Bosh leaves, hooray for him, go enjoy your money and Kobe’s shadow. But if he stays… good for him and real good for the Raptors, they are the team that needs him the most.

So this is a Bulls site and you just had your time wasted by a Canadian Raptors fan. So I should mention some Bulls opinion as well. Here it is…enjoy LeBron James.

Post by Cal St. Eau

Happy Thanksgiving! Bulls hire Tom Thibodeau as Head Coach

Video is not of our new coach, but this guy has a similar name.

Somehow Thibodeau possesses the qualities that allow him to be both a players coach and also a master strategist, which is unique because most NBA coaches usually possess one or the other. I feel like the young guys are going to be really excited to have a coach that they can be sure is light years ahead of them in basketball knowledge; they won't have to shallowly recite that "coach knows best" and have to honorably deter themselves from looking deeper inside to validate whether he really does know best. I'm already dreaming up Tom's first encounters as he initiates contact with the Bulls players. I can picture in my head Noah's long first phone call with Thibodeau where he excitedly cites how his work ethic is surpassed by none and can be KG without irrational focus, and throws in a comment about how basketball reminds him of reggae music. I can picture Rose's abrupt first call with Thibodeau where he mumbles his excitement for a few sentences and ultimately realizes how bored he is at the moment and decides that he needs to get off the phone and go shoot hoops in his backyard.

It's beautiful. I'm quite happy about our new Bulls coach.

What We Talk About When We Talk About Wins

When July 1 wakes us up this year, it will be to the sound of thousands of people chewing their finger nails. Nervously yes, but maybe also to show the Once And Future King that their fanbase will take him, flaws, mortality, fingernail chewing, and all. The prevailing wisdom is that LeBron is the secret doomsday weapon that will mark your team for league supremacy, no matter what lands you have already conquered, or peoples vanquished. All should be willing to open their strongholds and accept the King, right? If the Ark of the Covenant was up on eBay, wouldn't you bid?

The only problem of course, is that Cleveland still spent the last 7 years wandering in the wilderness. None of the new sidekicks for Bron proved to be that elusive “missing piece” that separates a contender from a champ. Larry Hughes scuttled through sheepishly. Mo Williams was nice, but not enough. Shaq was a desperate move, but Twan was desperate and misguided. Cleveland continued to add apendages until the monster ate the town.

The Bulls have taken a different approach. When Rose fell into our laps, we knew how lucky we had gotten, but also how far we were from winning anything. Rose was a one year wonder in college who couldn't shoot or take the SATs. Their was talk of specialness on the TV, but here in the midwest, we take things slow. Draft picks were taken and cap space was cleared, with the hope that our young people would grow up.

The thing is, they did. My question to you, Bulls followers, is what happens if we sign LeBron, and don't win a championship? What if Noah's disdain for LeBron grows into more than a playoff rallying cry? Do we want to see our home-grown team chemistry exposed to the whims of a desperate front office?

I say let's hire a guy that might actually fit in. Not a “missing piece”, (because let's be honest, we're still a few steps from the brink) but a guy who has spent his career waiting for a chance to play for something tangible. A guy who has become more chiseled every year, while his team remains amorphous. I'm saying Bosh over Bron, not in addition to. Because even though the Ark can flatten lands, it can also melt faces if the wrong army opens it.

He can be Acanthostega

The two graphs illustrate the different risk/reward associated with the possible coaching candidates in the following situations: if the Bulls get 2 key Free Agents vs. if Bulls don't land any big Free Agents.

The front office needs to be very calculated about which coach they hire this summer, and should base their decision on what free agents the Bulls do/don’t get. The type of coach we need for a Bulls squad that is similar to 2009-2010 is very different then the coach we would need for our current roster plus 2 newly signed superstars.

If we get 2 of the big Free Agents we will already have a team that is fully formed, which begs a certain type of coach able to orchestrate grandiose visions and egos. But if we don’t get any Free Agents, we need a whole different species of coach; someone with a generous orthodoxy. One who will allow the evolutionary arms race play itself out inside the complex ecosystem of team, because the progression of life forms has held many twists and turns. All of the sudden a leg grows instead of another eye, a fish suddenly grows fingers before they are necessary, and eventually one crawls out of the water and onto the shore newly fit to survive on land.

Dear Chicago, Lebron is Not Trying to Be Your New Dad

I'm all for Bosh coming to Chicago. Clearly, that is the best option. But. But, if the stars align themselves just right, Mr. LeBron James coming along (or rather, Bosh following James) to Chicago wouldn't be such a bad thing either. Now the main problem that I can see is that James would have to win the hearts and minds of Chicagoans (and Joakim Noah) who have grown up with He Who Shall Be Named, Michael "I Was Pretty Much Unstoppable" Jordan. James coming to Chicago would inevitably and annoyingly draw comparisons to Jordan, since LeBron has pretty much been hailed as the Second Coming (Second Coming of Jordan, though maybe Christ too. We'll know for sure once he starts talking about doing his "Father's business", which may or may not include ferocious dunking and a demi-god like physique) by those who have been paying attention to professional basketball since 2003.

So it's like this: Chicago Bulls fans not wanting Lebron James to come to Chicago is like that little kid who is getting a new step dad. This kid's biological dad was pretty much the greatest father ever to walk upon terra firma, but died tragically while saving disabled orphans from a burning orphanage, carrying children upon his massive back and cradling them in his sculpted arms. But it's been 12 years since Dad died and Mom is kinda getting lonely, making her way through a string of mediocre boyfriends, and she has the chance to finally be happy again and don't you want Mommy to be happy? And like all kids getting a new step dad, they think this new dad is trying to replace their old dad, which in both this analogy and in real life, isn't possible. Chicago, I'm telling you, LeBron James is not trying to be your new dad. But he will make your Mom happy by taking her out to fancy dinners once in a while, have fresh flowers by her bed side, and by performing stunning amounts of cunnilingus. Also, he'll win your Mom an NBA championship. You want Mommy to be happy, don't you?

Post by Mr. Flighwhite Jr.

What happens after the Tower of Babel?

A few weeks ago a sports radio show guy was talking about how the only two people they could see winning MVP for the next few years other than LeBron were Kevin Durant and Derrick Rose. Debate that or add more into the mix, but its not a preposterous statement. Rose is heading into year 3 in the League, and at the very least we can all agree that he is in that conversation. Mind you, he can’t shoot threes yet and just recently found a consistent jumper. After observing how quickly he added the jumper into his repertoire between seasons 1 and 2, I don’t think its out of the question that by the end of year 4 the opposing defense will already have decided to quit in between the time Joakim inbounds a pass to Rose and the time that Rose begins his powerfully relaxed dribble up the court, stalking his prey.

I don’t want anyone standing in the way of this Promised Land. As it stands now, no one on the Bulls roster will. That’s why job #1 is to not let anyone invade the borders of Derrick's potential. We need someone else on the Bulls who can both stand beside as a force of his own but also to compliment and expand the rich resources (tapped and untapped) which this team has been blessed.

Chris Bosh is one of the best pick-and-roll big men because he can actually hit from 15+ feet on the court. If you’ve noticed, the pick-and-roll was a sure way to get Rose to the cup or get a teammate open. It would be even more harmful for other teams if the Bulls had a big who could open the floor on the pick-and-pop to hit a consistent 15 footer. Bosh is one of the best players in the league, but doesn’t force himself upon or subvert the team’s flow by his play or attitude. Teammates look to him on the offensive end of the court by way of free will and reverence, not due to fear of heavy handed punishment filled with scorn and contempt from their team leader. Both Bosh and Rose even after having been bestowed the label of “franchise” player, are peculiarly alike in their in their ability to defer to the larger narrative of game, season, career. They know they can’t completely control the basketball gods, and in turn, they will be looked kindly upon and be blessed for their wise gesture.

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Chris, do you remember feeling that cool breeze?

This will be a series of posts from fans+future teammates... imploring the Bulls front office to make Chris Bosh our #1 free agent target. As well as other Bulls related conversation as necessary.